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Selfish

by Parkwood

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1.
It Gets Old 04:23
It’s been a long time coming since all of this The outcome of this situation is a result of my sins So give up on me I'll only let you down Wear me out like you always do Cause we both know you always loved to And I can't seem to let go And at the end of the day I'm still alone It gets old It's a shame I never found you You were buried in your pride You've always had your way with words and I've always had mine They always said We were both one in the same But the difference between you and I is I've changed And you've stayed the same I guess old habits are hard to break Cause I'm a lost boy And you're better off alone Than to be with someone who's a constant disappoint to everyone he knows
2.
Home 04:53
Don't wake me up I'd rather sleep all day than feel the sun Don't wake me up I can't feel a thing yeah I've grown numb This ain't no home I've grown accustomed to the things I don't know Where will I go I lost sight of everything I know And I've been growing angry deep inside my bones I've lost interest in your existence This ain't no home I've grown accustomed to the things I don't know Where will I go I lost sight of everything I know Christmas Eve at nineteen, I was writing a couple letters for you To let you know how much I appreciate you, every little thing you do for me, but it seems that I can't do enough I struggle giving happiness to those that I love And so I sat there next to my window with a bottle thinking should I just end it all
3.
Heavy Daze 02:48
Weary eyed Tired mind I've lost my patience this time Always distant Lost in transition I'll be just fine Where to go when there's no place left to hide When the only progress you've made are the holes in your mind Anxiously dwelling on all you've left behind Keep a cold heart and a steel spine Fill my grave with what remains Empty heart A shallow fate I lost my way Heavy daze take me away From this goddamned place Where to go when there's no place left to hide When the only progress you've made are the holes in your mind Anxiously dwelling on all you’ve left behind Keep a cold heart and a steel spine
4.
Deathbed 04:07
There is fire in the words we speak and every time I breathe in deep I can feel my lungs collapse into my chest cavity You can't run away from the things you say They'll rot your insides I've been losing faith in the mess I've made Will this be the end of me now I'm down and out I'll lie in this deathbed I made for myself I guess I'll reap what I sew I guess I'll reap what i sew I am fighting a war I am fighting myself Heavens turned it's back No room left in hell And when the battle is over And this feeling is dead I'll realize That the war was always just in my head I'll lie in my deathbed I'll lie in my deathbed
5.
Selfish 04:14
Cause when I stare into the mirror My reflection is all I see Everything I hate And everything I said I'd never be I know you're disappointed What the hell is wrong with me I'm sorry I was so selfish And all I ever cared about was me I am an empty set of bones Haunting these halls You're everything I hate Cause you're everything I'm not And I thought that I could fix myself But I guess I was wrong I thought that I could change But I guess I don't I guess I don't belong And when I'm gone Just know you pushed me away And it crosses my anxious mind every single fucking day And can you save me from my self destructive ways It's been six years and counting And I still have no Still have no regrets For the mistakes I've made Created the man I am today Disconnected in the brain I'm sorry I'm leaving again

credits

released September 1, 2016

Recorded by Eric McNelis of Sleep Audio
Mastered by Dave of The Gradwell House
Thanks to Sean McCall of twentythreenineteen

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Parkwood Hammonton, New Jersey

Jorge
Nick
Flannel
Brandon

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